The Many Different Types of Employees

Many business owners can attest to the fact that dealing with employees is the hardest aspect of running their company.  There are many different types of employees, most of which I have categorized below.  The challenge is knowing how to handle the difficult ones and knowing how to hold on to the employees who are an asset to your company.

In some ways, managing employees is like babysitting.  At times you will wish you had a degree in psychology.  Some days you will go into the office and seriously consider outsourcing.  The fact is, as business owners, we can’t do everything ourselves and, if managed properly, employees are a company’s greatest asset and essential to the success of any business.

The 80/20 rule suggests that 80% of the work at a company is done by 20% of the people.  That’s a scary percentage for anyone to wrap their brain around.  How can you nudge the 80% to be more productive and reward the 20% for keeping your business afloat?  The first step is to be able to identify what employees fall into which percentile.  In an effort to break down the different kinds of employees you can expect to see over the course of time, I have arranged them in the following categories:

The Loyal Minion

This person falls into the 20% mentioned above.  They will always come to you when another employee attempts to sabotage the company.  They will always get their work done and go above and beyond the call of duty.  You will be able to identify this type of employee when they come to you to inform you of someone insulting you behind your back.  This employee will work for you as if the company is their own but still regard you as their boss.

The Belly Acher

Some employees will complain about anything.  When there’s nothing to complain about, they will make something up.  No matter what you do to make their work environment more comfortable, they will always be pushing you to do more.  They will complain about the temperature, the copy machine, their fellow employees, their supervisor, their chair, their computer, etc.

The Attention Seeker

During your conversations with this employee, you will hear all of the things they’ve done to make the company better.  All dialogues will somehow funnel into a place where you will feel compelled to give this person a complement.  They will have an exhaustive approach in making you realize how important they are in an effort to avoid appearing expendable.

The Disgruntled

This is a dangerous employee who feels their mere existence at the company warrants a paycheck.  They feel overworked and underpaid.  If anyone is going to try to unionize, it will be this person.  They are pissed off, disloyal and will most likely attempt to sabotage the company in some way.  Watch this person closely.

The Thief

Similar to the Disgruntled, the Thief will feel as if they’re not getting enough from the company so they will find other ways to take.  They will steal office supplies, clients, money, inventory, time, etc.  This person is obviously not to be trusted and should be eliminated immediately upon identifying them.

The Self Starter

Some people will require minimal supervision.  Throw a policy and procedure manual at them and they can fill in the gaps.  Everyone tries to claim to be self-sufficient on their resume but few actually meet this criterion.  This employee gets bored easily and is always looking for something to do.  An excellent candidate for the next managerial position available.

The Ego Maniac

At first, this person might be mistaken for management material.  They will show signs of authority, confidence and appear to be the Alfa dog of the group.  However, a good middle manager knows not only how to manage but also has the ability to be managed.  Beware of promoting this person within your company as they will continuously engage in power struggles with you.  They will attempt to make you feel as if you work for them and will most likely bully your employees.

The Alarmist

This employee will always blow things out of proportion and can be very convincing at times.  It’s an interesting talent because they recognize that hysteria is contagious.  This person will have you convinced that the building is going to explode if something isn’t done.  They will come to you as if they are doing you a favor but don’t be fooled by their passive/aggressive ways.

The Smoker

At some point it had become somehow acceptable for employees to stop what they’re doing for the purpose of taking a cigarette break.  This is a luxury that nonsmokers seem to be exempt from.  If you ever want to know the inner workings of your company that you don’t get to see, consult with the smokers.  Everything that’s going on behind the scenes gets discussed outside when smokers are huddling up to endure cold in order to feed their addiction.

The Late Riser

You will almost always have at least one employee who tries to push the envelope when it comes to showing up late.  First it will be 5 minutes, then 10, then 15.  This employee gets paid vacation time in small increments every day.  They know that arriving 20 minutes late for work every day will seem insignificant at the time, but to them, it’s really an hour a week, 4 hours per month or like getting a free week vacation every year.  If you allow this activity, others will follow.

The Problem Solver

Definitely another very valuable employee, the Problem Solver will figure almost anything out.  Once they identify an operational deficiency, they will not stop until the issue has been resolved.

The Entitled

This person will remind you of Department of Labor regulations as if they were a human rights activist.  They feel as if it’s their God given right to be at your office, and while they’re there, it shall be your responsibility to make it worth their time.  Expect many pay raise requests from this individual.  They will always want to know what you can do for them, rather than what they can do for the company.  JFK would be so disappointed.

The Slacker

It requires great skill to be an effective slacker.  You may not even be able to identify this person right away.  They will always appear to be busy working, but in actuality, they are doing absolutely nothing.  They would much rather stare mindlessly into space than contribute to the productivity of the company. This employee will spend more time on social media than their work.

The Socialite

Similar to the Slacker, the Socialite will waste time talking to just about anyone in an effort to avoid doing their work.  Look for this person in the lunchroom making coffee or loitering by the watercooler.  You may have to make a conscious effort to force this employee to go back to their desk and return to their duties.

The Finger Pointer

Always blaming other people for screwing up, the Finger Pointer will avoid accepting fault on almost all accounts.  This is a difficult employee to manage because at times, they may be right.  Someone else might be to blame.  However, if they are at fault, it will be almost impossible to get them to rectify the situation. They will have you going around in circles before the problem actually gets fixed.

The Sociopath

Often manipulative and phony, the Sociopath is a dangerous employee as they typically lack a sense of remorse.  They can systematically destroy your company without really feeling bad about it.  Expect this employee to lie.  Even though they may appear charming at times, they can be a difficult type of employee to manage and can cause chaos at your office.

The Leader

Exhibiting emotional stability, the Leader can endure tremendous stress and handle high pressure situations without giving into their emotions.  They will show a sense of dominance and enthusiasm about their work.  Although they will appear headstrong at times, the Leader is an obvious choice for advancement within your company.

The Martyr

This employee complains as much as the Belly Acher but for some reason, seems to thrive on the drama they’re complaining about.  In fact, they almost appear to willingly put themselves in a position to suffer for no other reason other than to complain about it.  There may not be much you can do for this person other than to put them out of their own misery. 

The Gossiper

The Gossiper is a shit stirrer.  They create drama for the purpose of entertainment.  They talk about everyone in the office including their friends and management.  The problem with this kind of an employee is that they don’t know how to be loyal and their rumors cause so much hatred within the workplace that it could actually disrupt productivity.  Having this employee in your office will lead to a breakdown in camaraderie and harmony among the victims of their gossip.

The Devil’s Advocate

In some cases, the Devil’s Advocate can be useful in brainstorming complex situations and making sensitive decisions but sometimes can be a real bother.  They will often take a position in an argument that they don’t even necessarily agree just for the sake of debate. The Devil’s Advocate loves to argue and sometimes will work against you and have you second guessing yourself when it’s not necessary.  It’s wise to question their intentions as they may often have an ulterior motive.

The Creeper

Sometimes quiet but often inappropriate, this employee may not even realize how uncomfortable they make other employees feel.  Their intentions may not be sinister but they can inadvertently disrupt the natural harmony of the workplace.  If anyone is going to be accused of sexual harassment, it will most likely be this person.

The Troublemaker

This employee will make problems where there aren’t any, usually for their own benefit.  Sometimes, the trouble they make will could legal ramifications.  Similar to the Gossiper, they may entice people to cross a line, only to betray them in the end.  This is a seriously disturbed individual who is desperately seeking attention.  Their motives are usually to take the focus off of themselves and to make their coworkers look bad. 

The Follower

This type of employee often tends to become disloyal by emulating the Troublemaker.  They seem to be drawn to negative energy and follow negative people like mindless drones.  This is someone who will also attend the union meetings, complain with the Martyr and will go along with the Troublemaker, Gossiper or Alarmist.  You don’t want too many of these kinds of people in your office.

The Liar

Every office has at least one.

The Conformist

This employee will adjust to just about any situation the comes their way.  They typically arrive on-time, do their work without creating any problems or saying too much and then go home at the end of the day.  You will learn to appreciate this employee.

In order to properly manage employees, you have to understand people and how they think.  Very few people would work if they didn’t have to.  Therefore, right off the bat, you are dealing with people at your office who would rather be somewhere else.  Some employees are motivated by money while others work just to avoid uncomfortable situations.  It’s always more effective to inspire people to work, rather than to hassle them into submission.  Once you understand the psychology of what makes an employee tick, you will have an easier time figuring out how to get them to work for you.

For more information on how to properly manage employees, please contact Ashlar Consulting Corporation at 305-849-9399 or visit www.AshlarConsultingCorp.com.